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This article is about the post-scratch kids' Jack Noir. For the post-scratch trolls' version, see Spades Slick. For the pre-scratch kids' version, see Jack Noir.
Jack Noir

Jack Noir Plain

Bloody Jack

Lord Jack

There are more than enough face bashings to go around. Sburb Logo
First AppearanceSburb Logo

AKA

Lord Jack, Union Jack, Jack English

Relations

Draconian Dignitary - Subordinate
Courtyard Droll - Subordinate
Hegemonic Brute - Subordinate (Deceased)
Black Queen - Kismesis (Presumably deceased)
Lord English - Possesor

Live(s) in

Derse, Prospitian jail

Hates

The Black Queen, frogs

Music

Liquid Negrocity ♫
Black ♫
The Ballad of Jack Noir ♫
Octoroon Rangoon ♫
Checkmate ♫
Noirscape ♫

Jack Noir was the archagent of Derse from the post-scratch kids' Sburb session.

BiographyEdit

Under the orders of a new Derse ruler, the new, post-scratch Jack and the Courtyard Droll went to Prospit and assassinated the dream selves of both Jake and Jane. While the Droll took care of Jake, Jack went to greetSburb Logo Jane. Upon completing the first part of his task, he transportalized back to Derse, where he awaited the self-prepared demolition of Jane's tower. Jane was reported DEAD by the Dersite press, but Jack had a hunch that Jane was still alive and found her unconscious. Before he could attempt to kill her again, however, he was knocked out by the White Queen wielding the White King's scepter. When he awoke, he found himself in a Prospitian prison cell reminiscent of Jailbreak, and attempted to formulate an escape plan using the Courtyard Droll's knife-filled pumpkin. Unfortunately, he "accidentally" stabbed three of the guards, decapitated a brute who was radioed in to beat him up, then stuffed the head in the emptied pumpkin. He then rewired the waste disposal system so it would send things to the White Queen's throne, and sendificated the gory pumpkin. This would eventually lead to him getting brutally abused by several more Brutes. Or so we're told. He was later seen in Act 6 Act 4 tallying his time spent in the jail cell. Act 6 Intermission 4 shows him sporting a gold tooth and a manacle around his leg, an obvious nod to Caliborn.

Jack Noirglish

Oh no

154 days after his arrest, Jack is sendificated another pumpkin, containing a variety of knives and cutting tools, Crowbar's crowbar, a "YOU'RE MOTHER FUCKIN WELCOME" note from Gamzee, and Lil Cal. Cal allows Lord English to possess Jack, making him stab out his own eyes and saw off his leg, freeing him his manacle. He replaces them with Cal's eyes and one of his cell's spires, respectively, resulting in a resemblance to Lord English. Cal's power creates a massive explosion on Prospit, freeing Jack, and likely destroying what remained of that iteration of Lil Cal.

Jack English Attacks

OH NOOOOOO

He then proceeds to shoot a blast of energy at Prospit's moon, destroying it and thus killing Jane and Jake, while the Condesce does the same to Derse's moon. When Jane and Jake emerged from the explosion ascended to the god tiers, Jack tried to attack them, but was stopped by the sudden arrival of Jade, who used her first guardian powers (obtained from Bec) to banish him into the Furthest Ring.

In [S] Collide Jack and Spades Slick arrive at the fight against Terezi, Dirk and Dave on LOTAK. After a long fight against both the kids and Slick using the crowbar, he ends up dying by decapitation at Dave's sword. His head explodes, thus destroying a large part of Dirk's planet and creating a black hole. (As both Gamzee and the "Juju Breaker" Crowbar were on LOTAK at the time it was destroyed, it is assumed that this how they arrived at Caliborn's Earth. This would also explain why Earth would have a DenizenYaldabaoth, despite not being a planet generated by a version of Sburb or Sgrub, as Dirk's Yaldabaoth may have also been transported.)

Personality Edit

Jack has no tolerance for things he doesn't want to do. His vicious demeanor, sarcastic nature and nasty attitude are readily apparent, and he exhibits a lack of concern for life that isn't his own. He seems to be able to follow the directions of royalty without qualms, but if that is due to the new management or the lack of a Black Queen, it is unknown. He also seems to have a mild sense of humor, as he made a pun when Roxy disappeared, asking if the Rogue of Void had gone rogue. However, he realized how bad the joke was, and didn't blame the Draconian Dignitary for not laughing.

Homestuck Charactersv · d · e
Pre-scratch
Kids
Heir of Breath Breath Seer of Light Light Knight of Time Time Witch of Space Space Outline
JohnLogo John Egbert RoseLogo Rose Lalonde DaveLogoSlashed Dave Strider JadeLogo Jade Harley
ectoBiologist [EB]
ghostyTrickster [GT]
tentacleTherapist [TT] turntechGodhead [TG] gardenGnostic [GG]
Post-scratch
Kids
Maid of Life Life Rogue of Void Void Prince of Heart Heart Page of Hope Hope Outline
JaneLogo Jane Crocker RoxyLogo Roxy Lalonde DirkLogo Dirk Strider JakeLogo Jake English
gutsyGumshoe [GG] tipsyGnostalgic [TG] timaeusTestified [TT] golgothasTerror [GT]
Post-scratch
Trolls
Maid of Time Time Page of Breath Breath Mage of Doom Doom Knight of Blood Blood
Aries Aradia Megido Taurus Tavros Nitram Gemini Sollux Captor Cancer Karkat Vantas
apocalypseArisen [AA] adiosToreador [AT] twinArmageddons [TA] carcinoGeneticist [CG]
Rogue of Heart Heart Sylph of Space Space Outline Seer of Mind Mind Thief of Light Light
Leo Nepeta Leijon Virgo Kanaya Maryam Libra Terezi Pyrope Scorpio Vriska Serket
arsenicCatnip [AC] grimAuxiliatrix [GA] gallowsCalibrator [GC] arachnidsGrip [AG]
Heir of Void Void Bard of Rage Rage Prince of Hope Hope Outline Witch of Life Life
Sagittarius Equius Zahhak Capricorn Gamzee Makara Aquarius Eridan Ampora Pisces Feferi Peixes
centaursTesticle [CT] terminallyCapricious [TC] caligulasAquarium [CA] cuttlefishCuller [CC]
Pre-scratch
Trolls
Witch of Time Time Rogue of Breath Breath Heir of Doom Doom Seer of Blood Blood
Aries Damara Megido Taurus Rufioh Nitram Gemini Mituna Captor Kankri Vantas
Mage of Heart Heart Maid of Space Space Outline Knight of Mind Mind Sylph of Light Light
Leo Meulin Leijon Virgo Porrim Maryam Libra Latula Pyrope Scorpio Aranea Serket
Page of Void Void Prince of Rage Rage Bard of Hope Hope Outline Thief of Life Life
Sagittarius Horuss Zahhak Capricorn Kurloz Makara Aquarius Cronus Ampora Pisces Meenah Peixes
Cherubs
Muse of Space Space Outline Lord of Time Time
Calliope symbol Calliope Caliborn symbol Caliborn
uranianUmbra [UU] undyingUmbrage [uu]
Guardians
Dad Roxy Lalonde
(pre-scratch)
Dirk Strider
(pre-scratch)
Becquerel
God Cat Rose Lalonde
(post-scratch)
Dave Strider
(post-scratch)
Supporting
Characters
Jane Egbert Jaspers Lil Cal Jake Harley
John Crocker Mutie Lil Hal Jade English
Sprites
Nannasprite Jaspersprite Calsprite
Davesprite
Jadesprite
Tavrisprite
Gcatavrosprite
Fefetasprite
Jasprosesprite^2
Arquiusprite Erisolsprite
Davepetasprite^2
Carapacians /
Exiles
Wayward Vagabond Peregrine Mendicant Aimless Renegade Windswept Questant Writ Keeper
Agents
Jack Noir (B2) Draconian Dignitary (B2) Hegemonic Brute Courtyard Droll
Midnight Crew
Spades Slick Diamonds Droog Hearts Boxcars Clubs Deuce
The Felt
Lord English Doc Scratch Snowman
Denizens
Typheus Cetus Hephaestus Echidna
Hemera Nix Yaldabaoth Abraxas
Consorts
Salamanders Turtles Crocodiles Iguanas
Underlings
Imps Ogres Basilisks Liches Giclopses
Other Black Queen · Black King · Skaian armies · Genesis Frog · Lusus · Ancestors (The Condesce) · Horrorterrors · Betty Crocker · Colonel Sassacre · Casey · Guy Fieri · Insane Clown Posse · Maplehoof · Rambunctious Crow · Halley · Serenity · MSPA Reader · Ms. Paint · Andrew Hussie · Sawtooth · Squarewave · His Honorable Tyranny · Calliope and Caliborn's parents · Angels · Canon fan trolls

EB/GT TT TG GG - GG TG TT GT - AA AT TA CG AC GA GC AG CT TC CA CC - UU uu
WV PM AR WQ WK - SS DD HB CD