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Homestuck: Act 6 Act 6 Intermission 5

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Empty victory platform
Victory will depend on following my plan to the letter!

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Act 6 Act 6 Intermission 5 of Homestuck is a section of Act 6 Act 6. It follows the characters preparing to take on the main threats in the B2 session, in the new post-retcon timeline where Vriska is alive.

Click the "Sburb Logo" to open the page from Homestuck.

  • Sburb Logo Displayed through the medium of an Instagram parody called Vriskagram, numerous snapshots of the meteor trip in the new alpha timeline are shown, with the changes from John's retcons and Vriska's mere presence apparently solving all previous problems. For example, Terezi refuses Gamzee's advances, and Vriska puts a stop to Rose's drinking. All of the dancestors are seen in the bubbles except for Aranea, and Vriska's pre-retcon timeline ghost is shown there too. In the B2 session, Vriska replaces Gamzee as Jane's guide, meaning that Tavrisprite is now simply Tavrosprite. The flash ends with Vriska standing in front of Dirk with Equius's head under her arm, as Dirk holds Lil Hal, the very same scene where Gamzee created Arquiusprite in the old timeline.
  • Sburb Logo We zoom in on a black Skaian cloud, which zooms into Skaia itself (showing a destroyed Prospit nearby), and then to a doorless victory platform. Sitting upon the platform are the meteor inhabitants in their respective pairs (with Terezi and Vriska sitting in front of a locked fridge), Jake English (with Tavrosprite nearby), and the sleeping Jade and Jane (with Arquiusprite nearby the latter).
  • Sburb Logo Dave starts off a discussion by asking when John's supposed to arrive. Vriska explains that she went fact hunting with the time tables, and that he and Roxy should be here soon, from the pre-retcon timeline and unharmed. Karkat butts in asking how and why Tavros and Equius have been prototyped, and why other trolls have not. Vriska explains that she owed it to Tavros and she finds Arquiusprite hilarious, tactically advantageous, and genuinely happy in this state of being. Arquiusprite is currently deactivating Jane's tiaratop. Terezi asks Vriska about prototyping their other dead friends, and Vriska ultimately deems it not her place to judge people's mortality, plus the empty kernelsprites could be a useful revival backup. Terezi thinks it's pretty straightforward that while Sollux is happy where he is, Eridan doesn't deserve revival, and Nepeta and Feferi did no wrong and deserve life, so she convinces Vriska to let her use the remaining kernelsprites to revive them, but not immediately as Gamzee is currently stored in the fridge with their body parts. Dave interjects, asking if everyone's really okay with Vriska being the leader, and Karkat goes on a rant, ultimately calling himself not worthy of leadership, swearing off it forever, and passing the title to Vriska. Shortly afterwards, John and Roxy arrive nearby.
  • Sburb Logo John and Roxy greet the group. When Rose and Roxy notice each other, Roxy excitedly flies over and embraces her.
  • Sburb Logo John floats down to the platform and begins greeting everyone individually (except for Kanaya): He thanks Terezi for the plan working out, and she's glad to take full credit for her alt future self's ideas, and clarifies that the "stuffed dragon shit" was her "4LMOST C3RT41NLY FUCK1NG W1TH" him. Vriska thanks him for knocking some sense into her, and Rose thanks him for facilitating the reunion with her mother Roxy. He greets Jake, who is awkward and explains that he had planned things to say, but not in front of other people, and John understandingly moves on after avoiding Tavrosprite. Finally, John sits down and fist bumps Dave and, after an ordeal, Karkat. John asks why Jade and Jane are asleep, and Dave explains that they're under mind control and highly dangerous, as well as elaborating how their John died in this timeline. They both briefly reflect on Davesprite, and then Dave additionally explains that they have a few hours until all the bad guys return to the session.
  • Sburb Logo A character select screen is displayed for the victory platform, with eight conversations to choose between.
    • If John/Dave/Karkat is selected:
      • Sburb Logo John and Dave briefly rag on Vriska, and then Karkat talks to John about how nice it is to finally meet him. This quickly turns into an awkward revisiting of his old black crush on John, which Dave insists they talk through. This then transitions into John talking about how not homosexual he is, which Dave responds to by encouraging John to question the social messages they absorbed in their childhood about sexuality and romance. Karkat is irritated by the conversation, and has taken to hanging off the victory platform by his legs, while yelling a soliloquy about how unpleasant the conversation is to hear. They change the subject after that, and Dave begins talking about troll romance quadrants in general. Karkat finally comes back up to the platform when John expresses irritation with Terezi, which Karkat insists is a "textbook caliginous crush" from the way John describes it. Dave and Karkat offer to talk to John more about the topic when he's ready, as he seems pretty jarred by it right now, and they go back to casual reminiscing. John and Dave talk about Roxy, with Dave believing John to have romantic interest in her and in the end remarking that he views Roxy as a mother, and it's nice to have her around.
    • If Rose/Roxy/Kanaya is selected:
      • Sburb Logo Roxy and Rose are excited to finally meet each other, and they have a long conversation (with Kanaya joining in several times as well). When Roxy hears Rose talking, she compares Rose to Dirk, going so far as to describe Rose as a "girl version of Dirk". They delight over that a bit, then begin to discuss Dirk, and Rose then moves on to asking Roxy questions about her. She first asks Roxy if she likes wizards, to which Roxy says yes. Rose feels like this helps her understand both of them, explaining how she was too young to understand her mom. Roxy also reflects on how she never knew her mom "in person" and how lonely she was, and tells Rose about her own mom, including her highly successful wizard stories which Rose and Kanaya seem interested in. Roxy also brings up her own wizard stories, which both Rose and Kanaya want to read. Roxy reminisces about the trolls she is meeting and Fefetasprite, and Rose (who is from the post-retcon reality) reveals how her timeline's Roxy died. They reflect on their sadness after losing each other in their own realities. Roxy says that she had a funeral for Rose, which Rose says "is so "mom" of her". Rose further compares her mom and Roxy, which leads to a discussion of both of their drinking habits; they both turn out to have the same motives for drinking and for sobering up. They reflect on how they both relied on friends to help them through such ordeals, and the three share an emotional moment which is interrupted when Dave interjects.
    • If Tavrosprite/Jake/Vriska is selected:
      • Sburb LogoJake tries to initiate a fake conversation with Tavrosprite to appear less awkward in front of the others. Tavrosprite - who has secretly visited Jake on LOMAX in the past, defying Vriska's orders warning him against interfering with the timeline - inquires into Jake's motives, and Jake answers by saying that his damaged relationships with his friends have made him nervous about engaging in social activity. Tavrosprite tries to help him by getting him to say hi to Roxy, then bringing up his own self-esteem issues and how having a figure like Rufioh to look up to helped him gain confidence. Jake says that brain ghost Dirk should serve that kind of role in his life, but his appearances in Jake's life have failed to actually make Jake more comfortable. Tavrosprite gives Jake several compliments, then says that Jake can win back his friends if he uses the confidence compliments give him to improve himself and become a better hero. Vriska suddenly interrupts the conversation to inform "Jape," as she mistakenly calls him, that he and Tavros will never amount to anything. She continues by writing off all Pages as useless individuals who can best benefit their sessions by quietly staying out of the way of the other players. Tavrosprite tries to object by bringing up the class's high amount of potential, but Vriska dismisses it as merely a cruel joke, providing false hope to a player whose personality prevents them from ever unlocking that full potential. Jape's Jake's confidence is once again shattered, and Tavrosprite is prevented from hugging him after Vriska implies that doing so would result in Tavrosprite accidentally prototyping Jake.
    • If Terezi/Vriska is selected:
      • Sburb Logo Terezi asks Vriska if they should get back to their strategy meeting soon, and Vriska says they will, but that this feel-good moment is beneficial for the sake of everyone's morale. They reminisce on their past, and the sequence of events that brought them to where they are in this timeline, with Vriska saying she couldn't ask for a 8etter morail, and Terezi reciprocating. They overhear Karkat yellingSburb Logo, and Terezi speculates he's probably embarrassed about Dave R4MBL1NG S4NS F1LT3R 4G41N, and she also talks about how everyone keeping to their respective pairs allowed Dave and Karkat to get together in the first place. She's grateful, because she correctly speculates she probably would've gotten sucked into it without Vriska around. She says she'll miss Vriska, who insists she has to leave soon, and Terezi then expresses concern she won't be any good in the coming battle, that she feels pressured to be the absolute best version of Terezi in paradox space, and that she can't live up to it. Vriska reassures her, and when Terezi asks when she'll see her again, she promises to make the wait as short as possible, and drop by Earth eventually. They soon hear Tavrosprite reassuring JakeSburb Logo, and Vriska yells at them.
    • If Roxy/Dave/Rose is selected:
      • Sburb Logo Dave enters the conversation between Rose and Roxy, and although Rose finds this rude, Kanaya suggests that "He Has As Much Claim To A Sense Of Ancestral Connection To Your Mother As You" before leaving to give them private time and talk to the other trolls herself. Dave starts Roxy off on a "lightning round" of questions, full of copious Freudian slips, which he owns up to and seems at peace with later in the conversation. Afterwards, Roxy fires back at Dave with her own lightning round of questions. Dave puts an end to the questions as they fizzle out, and this is when she waves to Jake.Sburb Logo A few times in the conversation, Dave expresses discomfort with Dirk as well as Dave's actual Bro being brought up. Rose mostly interjects as an "officiator". They exchange psychoanalysis-related babble, which is interrupted by Vriska, as she advises Rose to kill Cetus. She is interrupted in turn by the newly prototyped Rosesprite, Jaspersprite having taken it upon himself to prototype pre-retcon Rose's corpse from LOWAS into Roxy's empty kernel. Vriska is enraged by this waste of a kernel, and she yells at Roxy not to hug Rosesprite. After briefly pondering what it means, Rose breaks down laughing as she reflects on how utterly meaningless the development is.
    • If Kanaya/Karkat/Vriska is selected:
      • Sburb Logo Kanaya, having leftSburb Logo Rose and Roxy's conversation with Dave to Talk To Some Trolls, approaches Vriska. She sasses Vriska, and they talk mainly about relationships, particularly their opposing views of privacy in a relationship. This transitions into discussion of the fascinating sociological structure of human families. Just as they start talking about Kanaya's duty to raise a new mother grub, Karkat abruptly joins the conversation, criticizing her leadership choices and throwing an almost excessive number of weak burns her way. She leaves at this point, and Kanaya mentions that Vriska is a romantic dead-end, both because of who she is and because she just told Kanaya she isn't interested in flushed or caliginous relationships right now. Karkat and Kanaya make plans to talk in-depth about quadrants sometime, possibly with WV in tow.
    • If Arquiusprite/Vriska/Terezi/Dave is selected:
      • Sburb Logo Dave leaves the Lalondes to their own devices, and goes to talk to Vriska and Arquiusprite. Dave starts to talk to Arquiusprite, asking him just to what extent he could technically be considered Dave's Bro. Arquiusprite essentially tells Dave that talking to him is something the real Dirk should do, despite Dave saying he feels more comfortable talking to a watered down version of Dirk, and that he would have some sort of social conniption if he had to talk to real Dirk right now. Vriska reassures him that Dirk won't arrive until their enemies do, and Dave changes the subject to (once more) the contents of the fridge. Dave asks if it might be okay to let him out, and Vriska declines thoroughly, stating her plan to simply drop the fridge in the middle of the ocean with him inside when Earth is resituated. Dave shrugs this off, and once more begins his one man Freudian avalanche, asking if "johns hot mom" is awake yet. As Dave stumbles over his words trying to save face, Vriska leaves the conversation, Terezi teases him about it, and soon Rose and Roxy chime in, with such gems as "janey is a straightup sexual fox riding a red hot nuclear bombshell". Soon, John overhears them talking, and when he asks what's going on, Terezi tells him "D4V3 TH1NKS YOUR MOM 1S HOT"
    • If John/Jake is selected:
      • Sburb Logo John begins talking to Jake, mostly about their favorite movies and the differences in their respective universes and childhoods. The topic of Jane's Dad comes up, and John becomes eager to meet him, especially since Jake's description of him makes John think he was a completely different kind of dad from the one [he] had. John resolves to check in on him soon, and to take Jane along with him. John remarks that Jake seems far less shy now, and Jake talks about his difficulties socializing in large groups, reminiscing on his false bravado in his initial letter to JohnSburb Logo all those years ago. John reassures him, saying that he's going through some changes, which can be difficult but also good. John also compares Jake's outfit to a superhero's, or that of "maybe a plucky side kick, at LEAST", and goes on to scoff about bat man while praising his sidekick, which lifts Jake's mood even more. John stops as he overhears Karkat whispering to WV, who apparently has plans to build a Can Town to scale on Earth, until Karkat notices him eavesdropping and gets mad at him. Then, Tavrosprite starts sneezing excessively, due to his allergies and the proximity of Jaspersprite, whom John suddenly notices along with Rosesprite.
  • Sburb Logo Vriska, banging the Warhammer of Zillyhoo on the fridge like a judge's gavel, calls the tactical meeting back in order.
  • Sburb Logo Vriska stands atop the fridge as everyone gathers around, and she begins debriefing our heroes on the situation. The Condesce has regrouped on Derse, preparing for the incoming Jacks just like the kids are, mainly because the Derse raid caught her off guard and robbed her of two key players. Kanaya remarks that the situation sounds complicated, and Vriska tells Karkat to make diagrams for the remainder of the conversation, to which he begrudgingly obliges. Vriska first describes how the Condesce is extremely dangerous, with a wide range of troll abilities, and needs to be taken down or at least heavily preoccupied immediately. She then elaborates on the three Jack Noir iterations, whom she refers to as "Dog Jack, Lord Jack, and Ro8o Jack." She casts Bec Noir and PM as the most powerful and dangerous, especially because she doubts PM's alignment, but advises the team to let her take care of him, unless the Condesce is taken care of and Jade wakes up, in which case she should fight them. Lord Jack she poses as less of a threat, due to lack of First Guardian powers, but still lethally dangerous within his range of attack. Spades Slick she considers the least threat, with unknown alignment, so she suggests assigning low-level fighters to take care of him. She emphasizes as key points of the battle that Jane, being a key revival player, should be kept out of the battle and given quick access to the breadth of the session. This, along with needing to keep the battles separate from each other, leads to the necessity of setting up a network of portals, which Rosesprite offers to take care of. Vriska then gets ready to assign specific combat roles.
  • Sburb Logo Having told everyone about each of the villains who are approaching, Vriska allows everyone to choose who is fighting who:
    • John, Rose, and Roxy choose to take on the Condesce. Kanaya wants to go as well, noting that It Would Be A Shame If The Party Defeating The Woman Who Terrorized Our Planet For Ages Had No Representation From Our Species, but Vriska tells her that she has a mission of her own that she has to do.
    • Vriska explains that Bec Noir is not an immediate 8attle priority because of PM attacking him, and thus she reserves Jade for the fight in case she wakes up.
    • Dave volunteers to fight Lord Jack, in the hopes that it will put to rest his prophecy of defeating Lord English. Terezi offers too, on merit of her battle skills. She also volunteers Dirk, much to Dave's obvious discomfort, and Vriska points out he'd probably seek out Dave regardless.
    • Arquiusprite wants to do something different, saying that he wants to do something on his own, "a gesture turning the tide of fortune for all of e%istence, a gestureSburb Logo which he would like to "shock everyone" with.
    • Vriska assigns Jake to take on Spades Slick. Tavrosprite wants to join as well, and Vriska tells him that he can, but not before he performs some particular task which is yet unknown; Vriska says that she will talk with Tavrosprite about it in private.
    • Jaspersprite doesn't want to do anything in particular that is important, saying that he just wants to eat some tuna fish and cuddle with either rose or roxy or both.
    • The mayor is not assigned any particular task, but apparently Karkat is *PERSONALLY* SEEING TO IT THAT NOT A SINGLE POST-APOCALYPTIC TATTER ON HIS HEAD GETS HARMED.
    • Karkat wonders what exactly he is going to do, and Vriska assigns him the task of assisting Kanaya with her mission.
  • Sburb Logo Vriska concludes the tactical planning, urges them all to properly thank John later, and moves into basic Sburb endgame responsibilities. She first describes Karkat and Kanaya's mission, which is to speak with Echidna. Both of them express concerns with the encounter, but Vriska assures them that it will be fine, reiterating that this is necessary in order to convince Echidna to release the genesis tadpole. Next, Vriska pulls out Earth, contained within a brownish eight ball, which she hands over to John for safekeeping until they can resettle it (after fast-forwarding its timeline a bit) in the new universe. John inquires as to the nature of it, and Vriska explains that, on a guess of what pre-retcon Terezi meant when she asked for John's walletSburb Logo, she made this new modus by combining said wallet with her eight ball modus. This allowed her to captchalogue Earth in Jade's place without the use of Space powers. Vriska then explains other crucial endgame Sburb tasks, such as building up the houses, deploying the grist hoards, and lighting the forge, so they can claim the Ultimate Reward. She asks if there are any questions, and John asks what she plans to do in all of this. She explains that she plans to kill Lord English, mainly by reigniting the plans previously abandoned by her pre-retcon self. Everyone starts awkwardly wrapping up the meeting: Karkat and Kanaya figure they should head to LOFAF; John, Roxy, and Rose decide to use the upcoming time to make a battle strategy; John invites Jake along to help him plan for his battle, and Terezi proposes making up a battle strategy with Dave. At this point, Dave awkwardly expresses how he feels uncomfortable making plans around Dirk without him being there, among other thoughts regarding Dirk. Vriska interjects, having had enough of his griping, and decides to expedite matters by pulling out Roxy's Crockercorp Appearifier Rifle, pointing it at Dirk, and shooting a fenestrated wall towards him such that he goes through it and exits out of the one sitting on the victory platform, drastically shortening his trip and launching him right into Dave. Vriska gets ready to leave, stating that she's not sure she can "take another second of this." John asks her if the Striders are really that bad, and she clarifies she doesn't mean them. She screams that her ghost is being a "FUCKING LOSER!!!!!!!!", and jumps into the same fenestrated wall, the Skaianet Laboratory hub that was powering it in hand, severing the connection as she jumps through. John stares at the device, speechless.
  • Sburb Logo The frame zooms out from the victory platform, all the way to the Skaian cloud from the start of the act, which is shown through yet another cloud. This cloud fades to black, then fades to an image of the scene in Calliope's dream bubble. We zoom in, and Calliope offers to wake up Jade and Jane. Jade begins to say something before they go, but suddenly the stage they are sitting on disappears. The yellow ring around them glows intensely, and the floor falls out beneath them. They fall through space as the ring unravels into a spiral around them, and they end up sliding down it.
  • Sburb Logo At the end of the slide, Jade, Jane, and Calliope walk along the yellow brick path before entering a memory of Echidna's lair, which Jade remarks is either her memory or someone else's. Jane suddenly wakes up, with the word "DISOBEY" flashing</font>" flashing briefly on the screen as she is returned to her normal god tier color scheme, and she bounces near John, Rose, Roxy and Rosesprite before landing.
  • Sburb Logo Arquiusprite congratulates himself on his accomplishment and fucks off to who knows where. Jane apologizes to Roxy for killing her, and they hug. John remarks on the increasing height of the hug pile, and he and Rose debate over who Casey/the Viceroy will be more thrilled to reunite with, when Rosesprite interjects that "he's been... scheming", referring to his skeleton army on LOMAX. Jane and John then properly introduce themselves, and Freudian compliments are exchanged by Rose and Jane. Dave, Dirk, and Jake have left, as well as Karkat and Kanaya, who apparently took Jade with them. After Jane mentions meeting Calliope in the dream bubbles, Roxy makes plans to give the Ring of Life to Calliope soon, with both Rose and Rosesprite offering to help her. Jaspersprite, ecstatic over all the human bonding, hugs the nearest person - Rosesprite. This results in Jaspersprite being prototyped, leading to the constantly flashing Jasprosesprite^2. Roxy is ecstatic.
  • Sburb Logo A dark dream bubble glowing green is shown, with some of Lord English's cracks in the void nearby. Calliope and Jade look on towards one wall of the lair, which has a hole in it. There is a staircase leading up to the platform, which turns into a pathway deep into the bright whiteness through the hole. A bright flash of green illuminates their faces as Alternate Calliope greets them: "welcome back, jade." She stands atop the platform, glowing green (similar to Doc Scratch), the entire area around her darkened. The light returns as she beckons them forward.
  • Sburb Logo Calliope and Jade ascend the staircase to the platform, and Alt!Calliope asks Jade to wait on the platform for a moment, and walks through the hole. Jade and Calliope exchange a glance, and Calliope follows her doomed alternate timeline self. As they look at each other, Alt!Calliope pulls out a wand, glowing green at the tip, which exposes Calliope's cherubic face when its light falls on her. The glow erupts into a bright green flash, ridding Calliope of her troll disguise entirely.
  • Sburb Logo Calliope tells Alt!Calliope that she's been searching for her. She was aware of this. After some faltering, Calliope agrees to hear the story of how Alt!Calliope was killed. She doesn't have much time, apparently, so Alt!Calliope chooses to tell the story in brief. As they stand in the middle of a familiar white spiral with a spacey backdropSburb Logo, Alt!Calliope recounts how she grew up entirely alone, how she killed her brother and dressed [her] words in his blood to hear victory every time [she] spoke. She started a dead session, with the same overall setup and time trial challenge Caliborn had, even down to having the same first break outcome. As a Muse of Space, this proved difficult for her, and she failed, so she eventually went to visit Echidna, who offered her The Choice, and she chose to have her life ended then and there. In exchange, she had to wait in the furthest ring until, after a long time, Calliope would appear, and it would unravel around her and become navigable. This was her signal to leave, and fulfill the rest of her promise to Echidna. The starry pathway fades away after she says this, and Calliope feels disappointed and purposeless, asking what she's supposed to do now. Alt!Calliope walks away, back towards Jade, telling Calliope to be who she is, to "live." The bubble fades to black, leaving Calliope alone, and then Roxy appears behind her.
  • Sburb Logo Calliope turns around, and Roxy, smiling at her, places the Ring of Life on her finger. Calliope's eyes return to normal, and she stares at her hand, then Roxy, in awe. Roxy takes her hand, they smile at each other, and Roxy does some sort of Voidey thing (similar to John's retcon powers at the end of A6A6I4) to teleport them out of the furthest ring, as the whole panel glows strongly black.
  • Sburb Logo A long, scrollable panel shows Echidna, both in the white dream bubble area that Jade and the Calliopes just left, and in her lair on LOFAF, with Karkat and Kanaya walking along a long pathway alongside her body arching through magma.
  • Sburb Logo Karkat and Kanaya reflect on their conversation with Echidna, which went smoothly. Kanaya and Echidna talked, though Karkat couldn't understand a word of it, and she deemed them sufficiently responsible and serious about taking care of the new universe. She Will Release The Frog When The Time Comes. They also talked about Kanaya and Karkat's "Natural Inclinations," with Kanaya's being, broadly, motherhood, and Karkat's implied to be leadership. They talk for a while about how these inclinations relate to their aspects, and Karkat recounts in detail how he killed his denizen, who was "WEIRDLY SMALL": essentially, the very fact that he got a "TRAINING DENIZEN", who knew in advance how insufficient Karkat felt, enraged him so much that he killed it, in a way that was so easy he shocked even himself. He then goes on to talk about how he'd like to do something important, and Kanaya insists that's why he's their leader, which he denies. Kanaya emphasizes that Echidna said so, though, and goes on to explain that Echidna's main condition of releasing the frog was that Kanaya protect Karkat, so he can go on to be a leader for the next generation of their people in the new universe. Karkat then goes to make his way out of the cave, Kanaya lagging behind. She says she'll meet him out there "Once Its All Over", and BONKs him on the head hard enough to knock him out. She then makes her way out of the cave, leaving his unconscious body behind.
  • Sburb Logo Roxy and Calliope return to the victory platform, where Jasprose greets them eagerly. John, Terezi, and Jane are also there, but Rose seems the most frustrated with Jasprose talking nonstop since being created. Jasprose explains that her new form has given her "a highly focused understanding of [their] aspect", as well as keener instincts. She then suddenly focuses keenly on Calliope, pawing at her head and admiring it aloud. She suddenly starts floating around Roxy, expressing attraction to her quite blatantly. Talking about Jane quickly segues into Jasprose reminsicing over the deaths of many iterations of Rose and Jaspers, where she also implies connections to several timeline iterations of the two. She also explains to Jane her role in the upcoming battle, then leave upon Rose's suggestion, through a sprite projection of a fenestrated plane.
  • Sburb Logo Jasprose comes out the other side in Echidna's lair on LOFAF, just behind Kanaya, talking about how everyone has been through a lot, and saying there was one thing she never got to say to Kanaya. She then nuzzles her intensely and abruptly leaves through a new plane, ending up at LOTAK, where Dave and Dirk were talking. They stare at her wordlessly, and noting the awkwardness aloud, she leaves again, this time ending up at LOMAX, where Jake and Tavrosprite are. She makes an interested note of Jake's unprototyped kernelsprite, stares at Jake silently for a few panels, then leaves again, due to how boring she finds them to be. She returns to the victory platform, much to Rose's chagrin. She reports the interesting tidbit, and everyone insists that they shouldn't, that the plan was to keep it as a revival backup, but she ignores them and recommends prototyping Eridan, Feferi, Sollux, or Nepeta. ;3 She then pulls a Cheshire Cat move, her face fading in the sky, and Terezi says "Y34H, SH3'S JUST GONN4 BR1NG N3P3T4 B4CK 1SN'T SH3".
  • Sburb Logo A fake character select screen shows up, with the following options:
    • Dirk/Dave (flashing green)
    • Rose/Roxy/John/Calliope/Jane/Terezi
    • Vriska/Meenah
    • Roxy/Calliope
    • Terezi/Rose/John/Jane
    • Roxy
    • Jasprosesprite^2/Jane
    • Roxy/Calliope
    • Dirk/Dave
    • Roxy/Kanaya
None of the options are actually clickable, so the reader is forced to proceed linearly with Dirk and Dave's conversation on LOTAK. They briefly remark on the weirdness that is Jasprosesprite^2, but the conversation quickly flatlines into awkward silences and forced attempts to keep the conversation going, and ends with Dave hoping the fight happens soon.
  • Sburb Logo The "character select screen" appears again, this time with Rose/Roxy/John/Calliope/Jane/Terezi as the selected option. Back on the victory platform, John re-ignites the conversation, though Rose refuses to stop facepalming with the pillow. Roxy and Jane both compliment Calliope's appearance in turn, before Terezi interjects, calling her ugly. She explains that it's not an insult, but rather that, simply, "H4V1NG 4 SKULL FOR 4 H34D 1S PR3TTY S1CK", as opposed to pretty. John then starts talking to Calliope about how awful her brother was, asking what she wants to do now that she's alive. She isn't sure, but John says that's fine. Jane then interjects, asking what happened in the furthest ring after she woke up, and Calliope recounts the meeting with her doomed god tier self. Rose then jumps in to pry a bit, asking what her role is in the endgame events, but Calliope insists she has nothing important to do. Roxy then pulls Calliope aside to have a conversation with her one on one.
  • Sburb Logo Vriska/Meenah is selected. Meenah and pre-retcon ghost Vriska, or (Vriska), are sitting in the horse cliff dream bubble, red Juju chest in hand. (Vriska) talks to Meenah about getting over her apprehension of horses, but Meenah seems generally detached, declining (Vriska)'s attempts to make plans, citing the dull, repetitive, dreamlike monotony of the afterlife. (Vriska) begins to key in to the fact that something is wrong, and asks Meenah about it, but Meenah is hesitant to talk about her problems. At this point, Vriska shows up, interrupting their conversation, and insists that she needs to take the treasure.
  • Sburb Logo Roxy/Calliope is selected. On the select screen, the two Vriskas stand off. Roxy apologizes for pulling Calliope away from all her new friends, but Calliope waves it off, saying that she's "still getting Used to the concept of in-person socialization at all, let alone with many people." They reflect on their experiences, both the good and the bad, and Roxy describes her philosophy that everything that has ever happened in their wild journey matters, from the dead people to the doomed and "bad" timelines to the living people in the alpha. Roxy explains that none of these people are "more important" than any others, especially using this to make a point to Calliope about how she's just as important as her dead, doomed self who is going on to do something significant: "you both came from perfectly legitimate realities and IMHO you are both equally valuable." In particular, she tells Calliope about how she's grateful to her for her role in helping the B2 kids and everyone else come together. Calliope accepts it as inspiring, but still wishes to do something useful, and Roxy explains that's another reason why she brought Calliope aside: with the help of Calliope's presence, due to her being a Space player, Roxy thinks she might be able to finally succeed in creating the matriorb.
  • Sburb Logo Terezi/Rose/John/Jane is selected. John wonders what Roxy and Calliope are talking about, Jane suspects they are catching up, and John remarks about them all having time to relax. Rose then starts grumbling about Jasprose, and how she presents a challenge to Rose's sense of identity and "Roseness", but John assures her, similar to Roxy's speech to Calliope, that all alternate versions of people are equally important. After remarking how they missed each other, the conversation shifts to wondering how Karkat are doing, and then to Rose's relationship with Kanaya, with John in particular remarking that they "make a nice couple." Terezi calls them N3333333RDS for the second time, and after John shooshes her, she blatantly blackflirts with him, and when asked why she isn't with Dirk and Dave anyway, she says she wants to give them time alone, and John wonders if Dave is okay.
  • Sburb Logo Roxy is selected. As she and Calliope sit across from each other, she focuses her energies, tapping into the history of Alternia, showing all the war and suffering, and the mother grub skull with several troll symbols around it. Roxy focuses her energy, and successfully creates a matriorb. Calliope is shocked, and Roxy does a victory dance.
  • Sburb Logo Jasprosesprite^2/Jane is selected. Jasprose hops out of a fenestrated plane upside down, makes note of her severely heightened narcissism while complimenting Rose, and then says the real reason she's here is to discuss strategy with Jane: "But first, I have somewhere to take you!" She carries Jane with her to LOCAH, ejects her out of the fenestrated plane straight into a statue of Hemera, and as Jane squints up at it, Nannasprite peeks out from behind the statue's head, and then floats down to Jane.
  • Sburb Logo Roxy/Calliope is selected. The two are standing at the doorway of Jade's house, as Roxy wants to leave her there with WV and Jade for safety, as well as keeping an eye on Jade. They stare at each other for a second, share a meaningful goodbye, and then Roxy flies off with the matriorb.
  • Sburb Logo Dirk/Dave is selected. Dirk asks Dave about the imminent battle with Lord Jack, trying to get the details straight, and Dave responds for a while very curtly. Dirk soon starts keying in on the fact that Dave doesn't like him, and when Dirk asks what the problem is, Dave eventually decides to answer, venting at length about the horrible, abusive childhood that his Bro put him through. Dave then calms down from that, apologizing for blaming Dirk for things that aren't his fault, saying Dirk seems like a good person, but Dirk insists the blame is warranted and talks about his own problems for a while. He then goes into detail about why he idolized his own Bro, when Dave asks. After a moment, Dave hugs Dirk, and Dirk hugs him back.
  • Sburb Logo Roxy/Kanaya is selected. Roxy approaches Kanaya and, after playing a guessing game, reveals to Kanaya that she has the matriorb, and gives it to her. Kanaya is moved to tears, saying that she thought the task of making a matriorb would be much more difficult, but Roxy remarks that her role was always probably related solely to hatching it and raising a mother grub. As Roxy sits down next to her, a hummingbird settles on Roxy's shoulder. Roxy and Kanaya talk about their respective trips, as well as shaping the new troll world and its people properly. Owing to this new responsibility, Kanaya expresses hesitation to enter the fight against the Condesce, as she initially planned to do, but Roxy convinces her, reassuring Kanaya that "we are ALL riskin stuff and ALL in this together and if youre with me and rose and john, dont worry we aint gonna let anything happen to you." Roxy takes her hand, and they fly away from LOFAF.
  • Sburb Logo The select screen flashes all red as we return to Vriska, Meenah, and (Vriska). Vriska has taken the Juju chest, and yells at her alternate self, calling her a useless, selfish loser and saying that she hasn't grown at all as a person, among other insults. (Vriska) starts to cry, which makes Vriska criticize her even further. (Vriska) starts to walk away, telling Meenah to follow, but Meenah doesn't seem to want to join her.
  • Sburb Logo Meenah decides to break up with (Vriska), and join the alive Vriska in fighting Lord English, citing reasons such as being bored, and being afraid that she's too bad of a person to avoid hurting the now very sensitive (Vriska). This drives (Vriska) to tears, as well as Meenah, who follows the grinning Vriska to re-gather the ghost army.
  • Sburb Logo A new select screen appears, featuring Jane and Jake on their respective planets.
    • If Jane is selected:
      • Sburb Logo Jane talks to Nannasprite, who gives her words of kindness and encouragement. Jane is very pleased, and accepts Nanna as her new sprite. Nanna says that she will assist Jane in healing the others during the final battle. Then Nanna mentions one more thing: there are two of her. As Jane turns around, Nannaspritex2 splats Jane in the face with a pie, sending her flying back.
    • If Jake is selected:
      • Sburb Logo Jake talks to Tavrosprite about how he wonders if he's figured out everything there is to know about himself. He also concludes that he's probably better off alone, without a romantic partner or even any friends, feelings which Tavrosprite sympathizes with. Then Jasprose appears, triggering Tavros's cat allergies.
  • Sburb Logo Jasprose uses a magical curative tablet to get rid of Tavrosprite's cat allergies. She then takes out Nepeta's head, gives a speech about the injustices Nepeta has experienced and how she will ensure Nepeta is only happy and fulfilled from here on out, and kisses the head before prototyping it into Jake's sprite, creating Nepetasprite. Unfortunately, this sets off Tavros's allergies again, since Jasprose had actually only given him a placebo.
  • Sburb Logo Jake's phone starts ringing as Vriska calls him. She tells him to reach into his hoodie pocket, where he finds the Betty Crocker mouse toy. He throws it down, and God Cat appears and begins playing with it. Vriska then tells Jake to call Tavros over and tell him to pick up GCat. Tavros does so, and GCat is prototyped, creating Gcatavrosprite. He begins sneezing loudly and violently, until Vriska uses her powers to put him to sleep. She explains that she wanted GCat out of the way, so that there wouldn't be a first guardian running around and potentially messing with their plans. She is in what looks to be a memory of the Land of Maps and Treasure, about to execute her own part of the plan.
  • Sburb Logo Vriska and Meenah discuss their plan to defeat Lord English. Meenah recounts her group's old treasure hunting mission, and how after Aranea revived herself, she and (Vriska) gave up on the plan for a while and explored dream bubbles, which, along with (Vriska) having mellowed WAY the fuck out, eventually became boring for her. Vriska persuades Meenah to take back up the old plan to use the treasure and the ghost army to combat Lord English, and discusses the possible nature of the Treasure's attack, but the pair are unable to come up with a plan to regain control of or raise another ghost army. However, as they further explore the dream bubble, Vriska sees a huge army of ghosts in what appears to be the Land of Sand and Zephyr, consisting of all 24 trolls except for herself, Meenah, Aranea, Gamzee, Damara, and Kurloz, led by what seems to be the pre-retcon version of Tavros, much to Vriska's shock.
  • Sburb Logo Still shocked by the massive army, Vriska demands to know how Tavros convinced them to join, even wondering if his animal communion was involved. He says he simply used friendship and kindness, something Vriska never considered. Vriska, shaken and angry that Tavros actually did something for once, breaks down while he brags gleefully. He starts dancing and playing air guitar, not listening as she says his name over and over.
  • Sburb Logo Vriska pulls herself back together and acknowledges Tavros's accomplishment, but asks him never to dance again. With the ultimate weapon and ghost army in her grasp, she decides to make a plan. Meenah interrupts, asking who would lead the ghost army. She decides she wants to lead and challenges Tavros to a duel for the position, but Tavros declines, simply allowing her be leader. He declares her his new empress and prostrates himself before her, to Meenah's delight and Vriska's annoyance. Meenah steps atop Tavros's horns and has him turn to face her new army. She gives them a quick speech about how they are going to listen to her and beat Lord English - and if they don't listen, she'll feed them to him herself. Vriska is delighted.
  • Sburb Logo We return to Jake, Gcatavrosprite, Nepetasprite, and Jasprose on LOMAX. Gcatavrosprite is still asleep, and the other three are having a tea party, with Jane's fridge serving as the table (and Gamzee still inside). Jake questions his position as the mad hatter in this loosely Alice in Wonderland based scene, but Jasprose hushes him, and coerces Nepetasprite into allowing the situation to be a date between her and Jasprose. She spends a while flirting heavily with Nepeta and telling her why Karkat was bad for her, when Davesprite abruptly appears. He explains that he was wandering on LOWAS for a while before coming here, and after wondering briefly about the present situation, he introduces himself to Nepetasprite. They greet each other with a handshake, which cause her to prototype him, resulting in Davepetasprite^2, much to Jasprose's dismay.
  • Sburb Logo The scene shifts to Calliope as she enters Jade's house. She calls out to see if anybody is inside, and finds WV, who shows Calliope where Jade is: She's in front of the fireplace with a red reminder and a red written note in her hand. We then see Jade and Alt Calliope in the Furthest Ring, traversing nearby the cracks. She explains the mechanics of the Furthest Ring to Jade, and how all of the aspects and pairs therein are closely interwoven out there, not just Time and Space. Jade twice asks to be woken up, and Alt Calliope refuses both times, saying they have to reach their destination first, in order for time to flow correctly. She also makes remarks about Space being the true master, and collapsing in on itself, which seems to concern Jade as she notices her First Guardian powers returning. She continues to follow regardless. Meanwhile, Davepeta introduces themself to Jasprose, settling on gender neutral pronouns after some brief confusion. The two talk through some hurt feelings and issues that Jasprose had been having, and consider continuing their date regardless of these new circumstances. Davepeta dawns on the conclusion that they're "a being that [Lord English] should in some way be vulnerable to." However, they decide to kill some time before the battle begins, opting to catch up with "a couple of bros from the past," and they fly away from LOMAX, leaving Jasprose and Jake behind.
  • Sburb Logo Arquiusprite is floating near the roof of Dirk's house on LOTAK, which reaches nearly to the edge of Skaia. He deploys a grist rig on the roof, and the entire building glows, before the rig begins shooting LOTAK's grist hoard into Skaia. LOTAK was apparently the last planet to be rigged up, as the rest of the planets are doing the same, and orbiting around Skaia, which glows brightly. As Arquiusprite stares happily at this event, Davepeta shows up behind him, much to Arquiusprite's shock.
  • Sburb Logo Dave and Dirk, noticing that the latter's house is now built up, discuss their respective guardians. Dirk talks about his Auto-Responder, and Dave follows up by talking about his brother's chat bots on his puppet porn websites. They then start a lightning round of questions to the likes of what Dave and Roxy did: Dave recounts more of his upbringing, and talks about birthday presents, his Ben Stiller sunglasses, and the bunnies John got for his birthday. Dirk then tells Dave how Ben Stiller was crucified by the juggalo presidents and then became recognized as a holy figure, and how the Condesce "remastered" the Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff movies in high defintion, which (along with Stiller's death) really set Dirk's Bro off. After that, they discuss how John ironically doesn't know that he's about to fight Betty Crocker, and Dirk's trainwreck of a relationship with Jake. Dirk notes that he's interested in meeting Dave's friends, but didn't want to stick around at the platform for very long, largely because of Jake. Dave asks more about his adult self's life, and Dirk says that his early life isn't well-documented, so Dave fills in the blanks himself, coming up with his own ideas of his adult self's childhood, which Dirk finds to be in line with the urban legends. They then talk about their god tier outfits: Dirk says that although he hated his at first, he soon found it rather comfortable; Dave had a similar experience with his, noting how they seem to be magic clothing. They also talk about how awkward Jake's outfit is, and they say that they'll probably wear regular clothes again once their adventure is over. Dave then starts a discussion about his sexuality, wondering how Dirk told his friends (that he was gay).
  • Sburb Logo Davepeta and Arquiusprite reunite. Arquiusprite is overwhelmed with emotions at seeing Nepeta again. They begin to roleplay together. Davepeta offers to give Arquiusprite a bro hug. They slowly come together, spouting Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff references, culminating in the greatest panel in all of HomestuckSburb Logo. Accompanying the panel is a message from Hussie, demanding that everyone take a selfie of themselves with the panel or he'll delete MSPA forever.
  • Sburb Logo Roxy and Kanaya return to the victory platform. John greets them, asking how it went, and says hello to Roxy's hummingbird. They make note of Skaia's light and discuss lighting the forge (with a magical ring), and after dismissing John's questions about Karkat's whereabouts, Rose prompts him to lead. Given his estimation that all the bad guys should be getting here any minute, he urges everyone to get going with a Very... "John" speech, particularly that his group head to Derse. i think we are as ready as we are going to get. Dave then messages Terezi through his smuppet wrist communicator, and she leaves via her rocket wings after bidding everyone adieu, while mutually blackflirting with John. Roxy and Rose both give him questioning looks as he blushes, saying "what?? as Roxy smirks at him and Terezi.
  • Sburb Logo Terezi flies towards LOTAK. She tries to contact Vriska, but she doesn't answer, so Terezi pours out her feelings in some messages for her to read later. She explains that although she was glad John stopped her from killing Vriska, she still can't help but feel empty inside. Even though being with Vriska helped cover up her insecurities, it wasn't enough. Hoping that having her pre-retcon memories back will allow her to learn from them, she wishes to remember what happened in that timeline. After her catharsis, she signs off and starts crying. Her Seer of Mind powers activate and she begins to see the memories of everyone, including the experiences of others before they died. (Vriska) walks through the cracked dream bubbles, reminiscing on all the fun times she and Terezi had as kids. Several dead characters are shown waking up as ghosts in dream bubbles. Pre-retcon Terezi awakens herself and begins walking, remembering the same experiences as (Vriska). She and (Vriska) eventually meet, embracing as they stare at the cracks in the Furthest Ring together.
  • Sburb Logo Spades Slick travels to LOMAX, determined to get revenge for his casino (which didn't stop being a thing) by taking down English. Slick interrupts Jake's pistol practice by dropping Bicuits' oven in front of him, releasing all the members of the Felt, Ms. Paint, and Aurthour. Slick is distracted, however, when he sees Lord Jack flying by. Using his suddenly real cybernetic eye, Slick determines that Lord Jack is the closest thing to English in the session, and goes to confront him.
  • Sburb LogoJohn, Roxy, Rose, Kanaya, and Jane are on Derse preparing for their battle against the Condesce. Rose informs John that the Condesce is in fact his longtime arch-nemesis Betty Crocker; to her chagrin, John responds maturely, stating that there are bigger fish to fry than having a melodramatic tantrum about it. John notes Roxy has taken Bro's sword from LOWAS, prompting her to start a speech about how she will likewise take back the futures that the Condesce took from humans and trolls. Right on cue, the Condesce appears above them while Jane's Dad, still alive in the Derse prison, looks over the kids with Proud Fatherly Admiration. Karkat wakes up in the dream bubbles, and Meenah tells him to go back to the mob of ghosts before realizing that he is alive, albeit not the same version of Karkat she has talked to before. Karkat asks Meenah if he can lead the ghost army's charge and make an inspirational speech, which Meenah agrees to on the condition that he does it quietly and far away from anyone else. Karkat ends up inadvertently starting a soliloquy about Dave, hoping that whoever he is fighting right now, he will be okay.
  • Sburb LogoJade is still asleep and traveling with the alternate Calliope. They reach the Green Sun. Calliope tells Jade that she had Jade accompany her to pass time for Jade, and that they will never meet again once Jade wakes up. She explains that Jade's powers are so great that, were she to wake up and join the battle, she could become a great liability. She advises that Jade have some "fun" before she wakes up. Calliope moves away toward the Sun, leaving Jade alone - until Davepeta shows up. Initially, Jade confuses them for Davesprite before Davepeta explains how they fused with Nepetasprite. They say that they plan to go fight Lord English. After Davepeta brings up their past relationship, Jade muses about the true meaning of the Space aspect, believing it to mean that she will be pushed aside by fate and deprived of important experiences - in essence, she is fated to be very lonely and empty. Davepeta posits that Jade still has memories of all her experiences, from all timelines, but the memories are locked away, and that everything she believed she was missing out on really did happen to her - or rather, to the "greater jade". Jade wonders how she will wake up, and Davepeta helps her - by giving her a goodbye kiss and then stabbing her in the chest with their claws. Jade then wakes up, with a note tied to her finger.
  • Sburb LogoJade awakens to see WV and Calliope. Calliope, wearing the Ring of Life, points to the note that is attached to Jade's finger. The note, written by Dave, and reads: "hey if you wake up you gotta deal with these two [and two images of the Bec symbol]", and, on the other side, "missed ya," which makes Jade smile. The three walk out of the building, look up at the sky, and Jade teleports herself to LOTAK, where Dirk, Dave, and Terezi are getting ready to battle. Jade greets them and tells Dave she got the note. Dave demands that she go back to sleep, but Jade objects, saying "i am very much awake! and i intend to stay that way :)" She tells Dave that he (as Davepeta) is a good kisser, and teleports back out of the scene. On the rooftop, Dave, Dirk, and Terezi see Spades Slick and Lord Jack appear, approaching from opposite directions. As they draw nearer, Dirk offers Dave one last lighting-round question, saying he'll give a straight answer to anything. Dave agrees, and asks why are we so fucking awesome. Dirk responds that That's the best fucking question, anybody ever asked. The three raise their weapons, ready for battle.
  • Sburb LogoIn the dream bubbles, Meenah, Tavros, and Karkat are at the head of the ghost army, marching forward, waiting for the arrival of Lord English. Post-retcon Vriska sits nearby on the Juju chest, smiling at the sky, with Hussie still watching in secret. The Cairo Overcoat finally approaches the bubble and proceeds to land with a smash, creating more cracks. Lord English exits and appears to roar as pure energy emanates around him. Everyone in the army looks on apprehensively. Caliborn is shown walking through Yaldabaoth's lair, crowbar in hand, to do battle with Yaldabaoth as he said he would. As he enters his denizen's room, Yaldabaoth stares down upon him.
  • Sburb LogoPM continues to chase Bec Noir through the session, until (apparently tired of running) he finally turns around to face her atop the ruined Prospit. They draw their swords and lunge at each other with their First Guardian powers in full force. Everyone else is then shown in their pre-battle scenarios: Caliborn vs. Yaldabaoth; Meenah, Karkat, and the ghost army vs. Lord English; Jake vs. the Felt; Dave, Dirk, and Terezi vs. Spades Slick vs. Lord Jack; and John, Roxy, Rose, and Kanaya vs. the Condesce.

TriviaEdit

  • As with several other featured in-comic social media accounts, Vriska's instagram account actually exists.
    • Contrary to the actual page having 49 posts, thousands of followers, and 0 following, the Flash shows Vriskagram as having 88 posts, with 8 followers, following 8 other pages.
  • Starting with the April 27th update (which was early, like the previous few, except by much longer, and later remarked in the log as an April 26th update), updates will no longer be at midnight for the east coast of America. Rather, they will be published at midnight in some timezone in Europe.
  • The 5/01 update was initially incorrectly labelled as 4/31, a date which does not exist.
  • The caption for the eight conversation select screen pageSburb Logo wasn't added until the last conversation was posted.
  • In the few conversations here where Jaspersprite and Roxy both speak, Jaspersprite adopts Roxy's text color.
  • The 6/29 update was initially incorrectly labelled as 6/27, a Saturday (and not on the horse calendar).
  • When the Jane/Jake select screen was initially posted, the Jake pages weren't finished yet. As such, a gif of a dancing Hussie was presented on this pageSburb Logo instead. AHdance
  • Dave and Dirk's final lightning round question and answer is reminiscent this scene when Davesprite is created.


v·d·eHomestuck Acts
Act 1 Act 2 Act 3 Intermission Act 4

Act 5 Act 1 Act 5 Act 2
[S] Cascade
Intermission 2 Act 6 Act 1 Act 6 Int. 1

Act 6 Act 2 Act 6 Int. 2 Act 6 Act 3 Act 6 Int. 3 Act 6 Act 4

Act 6 Int. 4 Act 6 Act 5
A1 A2 A1x2
Act 6 Int. 5
I1 I2 I3 I4 I5 I6
Act 6 Act 6
A1 I1 A2 I2 A3 I3
A4 I4 A5 I5 A6
Act 7

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